The Scars: Part 2/3
The Begining of Transition
If you haven't read the first part of this series, please do:
Maths made us friends (read the previous stories to know who), so I held on to it even after she left. It was the only subject I was extremely good at and I ended up taking CS in 11th grade and Computer became my most favourite subject seconded by maths and physics. It was not because I was a studious student but because I was going for entrance coaching and it was pretty helpful. So I started to think a lot. A lot.
A chaliyan was born. My classmates still mention that they still haven’t met a better (or worse) chaliyan than me. But I would like to point out that all the revelations of my newfound perspectives enabled me to do it. And slowly, I started shedding my introvertedness day by day. My team participated in Shastra 2016 and presented four different papers in Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics and Biology. We won the 2nd for ‘The Paradoxes in Mathematics’ and we can still proudly say that any person who was in that room would still remember us. We proved √2 =2 and π=2. That one damn presentation gave me the strength to do more in my life.
But I always missed something. I couldn't give up on her yet. To be honest she was the only girl that kept coming into my dreams then. I started listening to a lot of depressing or sad love songs and some music. Some lyrics made me feel someone wrote it for me.
In 2017, I completed my 12th grade and after JEE results came, repeating the exam was the only option dad offered me which I rejected adamantly. Maths opened an escape route through KEAM and I landed at a college that turned my life upside-down.
Life at Model Engineering College: It was the golden ticket I needed. Truthfully as the everlasting tradition of MEC, I too underestimated the college at first. Every MEC’ian does. But after a while, I too saw the magic. I slowly got adjusted to my class. A lot of drama and incidents took place there. For instance, not knowing the difference between FB and WhatsApp I used to post selfies with captions like ‘Watching Movie with Brother’ in the class group, posts songs and most annoyingly (for others) ‘CHALI’. Even seniors in MH who used to check my classmates’ phone called me and ragged me for the challies.
Anyways, a couple of months into college, I noticed this girl ( no need to dig, I won’t be even mentioning if she was my senior, junior or batchmate). She was this silent girl. She mostly kept to herself I think. I used to notice her in the canteen or Sweet Palace (a bakery close to MEC). Slowly, I noticed that she had amazing ideas and thinks outside the box. So I think I saw a lot of similarity in her with myself. And yeah, I had a little crush on her. We started talking about her ideas and random stuff. We used to texts sometimes. During times of flood, we used to talk more. Our conversations were less in college but we used to text more. She was friendly.
One day she suggested that we should talk more in college and out of the blue, I confessed to her that I have a slight crush on her. She felt weird and the conversation ended. The next day her boyfriend, who also is a friend of mine called me and said they were in a relationship. I felt really embarrassed and apologized to them. I should have known her relationship status before saying anything. And now I made a fool out of myself. But this didn’t hurt me much nor I was sad. It was easy to move past it knowing she likes someone else and slowly we build back our friendship.
Perhaps I waited too long to tell her and should have known more about her. But I am glad that I confessed to her because I now had the guts to confess my feelings unlike in the previous story. This was good closure. Altogether it was a good experience because it helped me shed my fear of talking to girls. Make no mistake, I was still shy to talk to people, especially girls. How did it change?
Enter NSS CAMP 2019!
To be continued….
