UPSIDE DOWN
Some content of this article may not be suitable for a certain audience. If this article makes you uncomfortable or relives a traumatic incident from your life, please discontinue reading or read this with a trusted individual.
She was a cute 11 years old princess. Probably in class 5. Once, during summer vacation, she and her parents went to visit her grandfather who had been admitted to a hospital. It had been so long since they last saw him. She was wonderstruck by those long windows that held some really beautiful sceneries and she was very fond of nature. When they reached grandpa’s room, his smile really lit up the room. He was accompanied by a male home nurse who too smiled at her welcomingly.
During their conversation somehow the subject drifted to nature and she got excited. The home nurse asked her whether she wanted to go with him to see those long big windows. She asked her mum and she nodded yes. They both went outside the room to the windows. It was in a sharp corner. The hospital was very silent. She was standing near the window and he stood just behind him. She was eagerly watching the birds and the greenery when she felt that he was standing uncomfortably close to her. Not realizing what was happening, she kept silent and reassured herself that it’s fine. But then it got worse. She stood there frozen both physically and mentally. She standing there as prey, trying to divert her thoughts.
When he was done with her, he held her hand and walked her back to the room where grandpa and mum were talking. She couldn't process her thoughts. She couldn’t believe what just happened, what was real and what's not.
Yes. She was molested. She was groped. She was sexually assaulted by a nurse inside a hospital.
When it sank in, she wanted to run away but was too tired. She wanted me to scream, so loud. When finally they were about to leave, the nurse asked her parents whether she could come with him to buy some medicines but her parents denied, after which he asked them whether she could stay there with grandpa for a night. Mum said if she wanted to, yes. She knew at that moment that if she stayed, the next day she would get a place in the newspaper under the headlines ‘Minor girl Raped and Murdered by a Home nurse’. She told them that she had some works to complete for school so cannot stay there.
“When we left the hospital. I didn’t want to look back as I knew he would be surely staring at me. While on my way back home I thought how my dad could have saved me if I had made some noise back then. Even then I could feel that touch of his on my body … I felt lost, hopeless and helpless and I knew my heart was bleeding from the scar he carved on it. Years have passed .. still, at times I am reminded of that incident when I read or hear anything about someone getting molested or raped. But one day this moment too would change .. this scar too would get healed ..this memory too would fade away.”
— A girl who prefers to be anonymous.
Why remain anonymous you ask?
Because after learning about this, people are gonna judge her. And many of us remain anonymous or keep our mouths shut because society blames the victims.
So what exactly is happening here?
Society fucked us all? Yes, and we aren’t any better. They blame victims for dressing in ways to attract men. Well, you think girls only get sexually assaulted, wrong.
Once, while he was in 9th, he was travelling on a bus with his family. He was sitting behind them because he loved the window seat, the cool breeze, and the world moving backwards. The bus was almost empty with very few passengers. A man, maybe in his twenties or thirties onboard the bus and sat next to him. He was wearing a black cap, he had a long beard and moustache. He removed his cap and held it in his right hand. Slowly he moved his hand and hat over to the kid and placed it over his pants. The kid felt it was a bit awkward but didn't give it much thought and kept looking out. After some time, he started groping the kid and it was covered with the cap. The kid realized the gravity of the situation and was stone cold. He didn't know what to do. His parents were just in the front seat of him and he couldn't even call them for help. After some time, he took the kid’s hand and tried to put it over his pants. Realizing what will happen, the boy with all his might pulls his arm back. The struggle ended he understood that the kid won't allow him, and he continued groping him. After about an hour or so of torture, a stood up and left the bus. The kid did not even dare to turn his head and look at him. He did not talk until he got off the bus.
As time passed on, the pain and wound left him, but the anger and memory still stay on. So he understands what it feels like. The feeling of coldness. Being unable to know what reality is and what's not. That moment when we don't know what to do. But never ever he will allow another person to trespass on his body. And thank god for that kid, for today that kid had the guts to write this article.
Why do these things happen?
Boys and Girls are separated from a young age in school. This increases the sexual tension between them in the long run. Teachers punish children by making them sit with the opposite gender. The class is separated into 2, boys and girls. Why aren't many people focusing on this point of the life of kids? Maybe the school management and teachers need to learn what feminism is. This gap increases more during adolescents. Both don’t know exactly what is happening in the other's life.
A solution? No, but maybe part of the solution:
So let’s start right there. In schools. Let’s teach the next generation more about reality. Moral values, sex education, periods, what consent is, what is a wrong touch and which are our private parts, what masturbation is, what pornography. And mostly, how to love, the types of love, the difference between a crush and romantic love, and how to express love and be intimate.
Conclusion
You are not alone out there. There are many out there who needs our help as once we needed help. It wasn't your mistake. Don't blame yourself ever for what they did to you. I pray one day you can scream to the world what happened to you. I pray one day you can put it behind your life and move on. I know some of you had it worse than me. But let's show the world they cannot sideline us because they think that someone else can pollute our body and us. Love you all, always.
Alan Sebastian George
Reach me out on LinkedIn
